Why does the one person in my life take so much as a default through depression as I watch him lay happily with me only to a few hours later go home and miss me so bad that he relaxes back into those thoughts? I can't find a way to fix it. I hope he notices i'm trying to be much more of an upper and less of a naggy baggy ya you know. I just want the happiness to overflow and have smiles on each others faces as we glance onto better things. Tis all I want, tis all I truly need. I'm tired of those people that take everything for granted. I work with a group of them. I am 19, pushing 20. I am on the verge of being completely broke, and I had my general manager express to me the worse news ever. No, i'm not being fired. I'm being slightly under-worked more than I used to ever be.. wait. That never happened. Anyways, so now I have to confront my parents as she always is nagging me to pay for things I honestly don't ever have the money for. I'm a teenager. I like to have fun, and chill and buy things with my hard earned money. But no, I bought a car because she got tired of toting me around and having to wait on me hand and foot at my job, and school. I am so happy once that I get the chance to move out. Even if I can't handle it right now, i'll find a way. Payments should come easier.. I mean taxes are only 5 months away. I think I can handle. I miss my amazing right or left side. He shines through the dark clouds of my day, and trys so hard for me to remain stable.. Again. Why can I not do the same for him? I am going to try harder. He deserves it all and likelyness of being happy for once in his life. Back to those groups of people that can have it all. You know at one point in time you've met one. Let me say, I thought I had that life till I knew it was just a scam so I wouldn't have to work, or go to college. I can't believe my mother told me that my dad still does not approve of me going to college. She told me this not too long ago. I hope he doesn't try it with my sister. She has worked so hard, we are all proud. But now, I understand why he doesn't help me financially at all. Makes sense now. Well, I had hot chocolate. I think it's why my brain has been molding words into sentences all day.. wink wink.